Try This: Wear the most outlandish outfit you can find in your closet. Then dance to this song.
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You are what you eat. This is what people say when they want to guilt you into choosing healthy foods. And SO many people have SO many ideas–often contradictory–about what we should eat.
But what does it actually mean, to be what you eat? And is it true? Is there a way to understand that concept without attaching guilt, shame, and anxiety about how we feed ourselves?
Let’s back up a bit. The quote from Pema Chodron comes from her chapter about how we experience and use the energy that underlies all of life. Depending on how we access this life force, it can make us feel free, open, and energized or it can make us feel stuck and caged. The more honest we are about who we are (our personality, our thought patterns, our emotions, etc.), the more we’ll understand what makes us feel awake and alive and what makes us feel lethargic and dull.
You’re in addiction recovery because you are choosing to feel more awake and alive in your life. You know that substances, no matter how exciting they may feel at first, lead to a place of deadness.
You may have been counseled to fuel your body with nutrition to make up for the depletion of nutrients that substances cause. You may also be starting to realize one of two things: 1) a focus on healthy eating can dip into obsession and compulsion, or 2) certain foods can provide a substitute “high” and lead to an eating addiction.
So how can you hear all of the advice about diet and apply it in the way that works for you? Much like the previous post about exercise, the key is to take the middle path. The middle way is one of balance, and it’s a balance that is unique to you. In other words, only you know which foods will help you feel more alive and awake and which foods will dull your mind and body.
It can feel scary to be told that no one can know what you need but you. That’s part of what it means to live free–to take full responsibility for your choices. And to not worry about what anyone else thinks of those choices.
Here are some ways to get to know yourself–and be friends with yourself–in the arena of food and eating:
- Notice how your body feels while you’re eating a certain food, and also how your body feels afterward.
- Notice what your mind is doing while you’re eating a certain food, and what it does afterward.
- Notice any emotional responses you have to eating certain foods.
- Notice how you eat. Do you eat slowly or quickly? With other people or alone? With distractions (TV, book, phone) or without?
- What kinds of foods are you always drawn to?
- What kinds of foods do you tend to avoid?
Note: The word “notice” above means a light attention to. It does not mean “notice and worry” or “notice and judge” or “notice and feel self-righteous.” It does not mean “notice and keep detailed records of.” It just means notice. Be curious about this body you have, this mind you have, and how they react to food.
Remember that only you know what you need. Maybe sometimes you want to use food to check out. Maybe sometimes you want to use food to energize yourself. Only you can find the balance.
If you sense that you’re getting out of balance and feeling anxious about it, take the steps that will help you have compassion for yourself and find the middle way again. You might want to get nutritional counseling or talk with your therapist about how your eating patterns relate to your emotional needs.
You are what you eat. Is it true? Yes, in the sense that the foods you choose reflect how you want to feel and be in the world. Food is just another way to express your unique approach to life and how you relate to your own life force.
So…eat and live free!